I have had many, many moments where I want nothing more than to pack my two suitcases for the ship and be done, leaving the rest of my mess of "stuff" behind. Packing is stressful. I'm guessing this is true for most people, though there are some that seem to accomplish it with ease. And because I am an overachiever, a masochist, or simply a vagabond with too much stuff, every time I do a big move it's far more than just pack up and go.
Instead, it's a four tiered pack.
Items from column A are coming with me (this must be limited to what I can fit in two suitcases and a backpack).
Items from column B are some basics that I would like to leave with my parents in case I'm lucky enough to sneak away for a holiday home and don't want to bring everything back with me. (this also needs to be limited to a couple of suitcases due to space issues).
Items from column C are things I'd rather not buy again. These are destined for storage of some kind, be it letting a friend use it while I'm gone, begging friends to store things while I'm gone, or paying for storage.
Items from column D are sell/give away items.
This is relatively easy, but time-consuming. And actually quite hard when asking for help, because my friends don't necessarily know what items need to be going into what category. And so I try and do everything, and end up overwhelmed. That has been the story of this month. Overwhelmed with what needs to happen. Also not helped by the fact that the last two times I did a big move I put stuff in storage/added to previous storage, and last year all of those things moved in with me. Yup. I have too much. But I ignored it for a year.
And so, God has called me to give up this excess. And the more I try and get rid of, the more I find space to store things, or people to buy things. An exercise in giving in and letting go. Tomorrow is the garage sale (dependant on the weather), and I'm hoping to get rid of most things that are left. I may actually cart off the leftovers to goodwill, just so I don't have to think about it anymore.
I've been blessed the last two days with help packing, and even there, it was learning to let go. I need to control what I'm doing, and this asking for help, and letting others see how much excess I had allowed myself, that is hard. Which just reinforces how much I needed to do that.
It's not the easy that we need in our lives. It's the hard that we need, that grows and expands us, stretches us out of our old dry selves, like a crab shedding a shell that's become too small, it leaves us vulnerable at first, but that's when they get the chance to grow.
Perhaps that's why I can't stop saying yes when God presents me with a new challenge, because I'm ready to shed the old and grow.